alone on Valentines Day

February can be a rough month for women who are sixty and single.  I have never cared much for Valentine’s Day, whether I was in a relationship or not.  It always seemed forced and competitive and just too much.  When the kids were little I remember it being a huge celebration that was only rivaled, in the elementary school, by Halloween.  It felt like a popularity contest among the children and among the mothers.

So, during the years that I knew my marriage would be ending it was torture.  I thought I wouldn’t miss Valentine’s Day one bit when I became single, but I was wrong.  I didn’t love it before, I hated it now that I was sitting in my tiny apartment with my dog, Red, having a pity party.  Now, it wasn’t an option so it became important to me.  Go figure.

February is Rough

Immediately following Valentine’s Day is President’s Day Weekend and that first year on my own seemed like every single human I knew went away for that long weekend.  The weather was below zero and the word long to describe that three day weekend could not have been more accurate.  It was bad, I was miserable and I now knew what was like to be alone during the Valentine’s Day week.  I told my self that I would never again experience that kind of loneliness over a stupid holiday and a stupid long weekend in February.

Since that bad February a couple of years ago I have made it a point to travel during the middle of the month of February in order to avoid a meltdown.  It doesn’t have to be a big trip, just one that keeps me busy doing something I love.  I might go to my hometown and visit friends, or take a knitting class or visit one of my children.  Anything that will keep my brain engaged is perfect for the middle of February.

Now, if you don’t have someone to love on Valentine’s Day, find something you love to do and enjoy.  That’s more fun than exchanging a card anyway, right?  Treat yourself, get through the rough days and remember Spring is right around the corner.